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Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Then they came for the right wing talk show hosts

hive mind

There's a new movie for all you eco-friendly, diversity-addled, liberal, intellectual elites out there. It's called Hive Mind, created by Ladd Ehlinger, Jr., who previously worked as a "military multimedia artist." Let's let the auteur describe the concept behind the film.
When our own President is constantly saying 'we must all think collectively,' naturally as a filmmaker I thought: scifi-horror film! Eco-friendly nudist Borg-like zombies! Cross-bred with Paris Hilton and Tila Tequila! Because really, who wouldn't?
Dang, he's on to Obama. Right, it's because all democrats and liberals think alike that all of Obama's ideas for change are sliding through Congress like shit through a goose. A naked goose! RRrrrooww!

A ChristianNewsWire review encapsulates the plot.
Zombies created by a cell phone that you swallow, that merges with your brain. Dubbed the "I-Mind," the phone lets you Twitter telepathically, download movies straight to your brain, and keep your contacts forever. Britney, J-Lo, Pamela and Paris all love their I-Minds. But there's a sinister side-effect: loss of free will to the collective Hive consciousness. Everyone is either assimilated or killed in Hive's eco-friendly efforts to reduce the population.
Oh, where is the hope? Who will save us from this silly plot?

Ehlinger describes his hero.
The lone hold-out is Doug Trench, conservative talk-show host and stevedore of freedom. He's lived in a bunker for twenty years, ever since humanity was consumed by the collective.
"Stevedore of freedom"? I had to look that up. A stevedore is "a person whose job is moving goods on and off ships", basically a longshoreman. I don't get it. I guess I'll have to rent the movie, because Ehlinger is bypassing the traditional distribution to theaters to put this important film directly into the hands of his fans. In other words, straight to DVD.

2 comments:

Hive Mind said...

Oh best blog post EVER I will be posting it on my site as soon as I stop giggling oh I love it

- FilmLadd
http://LaddEhlingerJr.com

Washington Carrasco said...

Too bad it had to go "straight to DVD." Now it will end up in the real landfills instead of the digital landfills.